You didn’t HAVE to get the parasol, hat, and purse to earn three stars or an S grade or whatever the only competitive element was against yourself, to finish levels faster or self-impose arbitrary challenges. Donkey Kong was a failure largely because they made the trinket collection compulsory. Sad that Taisuke Araki didn’t do much VGM work, he had real chops. Say what you want about the “relative capabilities” of the Game Boy, but “Showdown at the Tower” is metal as fuck, better than the final boss theme even. I’ll have one good afternoon with this probably.” And then of course, the famous misdirect, and I was all in.

I got Donkey Kong for Christmas from my grandparents and was like, “Great, cool. But for some reason, I was allowed to own a Game Boy. I had obsession and rage issues with video games as a kid that my parents didn’t like, so after a couple of botched runs with the NES and the Genesis, they didn’t let me own consoles. Donkey Kong ’94 is one of my all-time favorites, top five for sure, and I was absolutely floored when it made the VGA list.

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